Maybe You’re Asking the Wrong Question
Estimated Reading Time: 4 minutes
This Career Story builds on Career Insight #1, I Feel Stuck in My Career. Where Do I Even Start? Image: Jon Tyson / Unsplash.
When you’re thinking about changing careers, or when circumstances such as redundancy, illness, injury or relocation force the issue, the most obvious question is often:
“What should I do?”
It’s a perfectly reasonable question.
But it may also be a question we ask too soon.
When we’re uncertain, most of us naturally want certainty. We want an answer, a direction, perhaps even a list of suitable jobs that will make everything clearer.
Yet career decisions rarely work quite that neatly.
Sometimes, making progress isn’t about finding a better answer. It’s about asking a better question.
Starting somewhere different
In the original Career Insight, I Feel Stuck in My Career. Where Do I Even Start?, I wrote about what can happen when we become so focused on finding the “right” career answer that we overlook the evidence already sitting within our own experience.
That evidence can be surprisingly ordinary.
The work we enjoy.
The tasks that seem to come naturally.
The environments in which we feel comfortable and capable.
The moments when we’ve felt proud of what we contributed.
The things other people regularly ask us to help with.
None of these, on their own, necessarily tells us what job we should do next.
Together, though, they begin to reveal patterns.
And patterns can give us somewhere useful to begin.
“Sometimes the right question is more valuable than the perfect answer.”
Questions that create movement
Instead of immediately asking:
What job should I do next?
we might become curious about our experiences first.
What kind of work gives me energy?
What tasks seem to come naturally?
When have I felt proud of the contribution I made?
What sort of environment brings out my best?
What have I enjoyed before that I’d like more of?
What consistently drains me, and what might that be telling me?
These questions don’t usually produce an instant career answer.
That’s not their purpose.
They help us notice.
And once we start noticing, we have something more useful to work with than a blank page.
Direction before certainty
There can be a temptation to believe we need certainty before taking action.
In practice, it often works the other way around.
A conversation leads to an idea.
An idea leads to some research.
Research leads to speaking with someone working in an area that interests us.
Perhaps that leads to a short course, volunteering, job shadowing, updating a resume or applying for something we might previously have overlooked.
Each small step gives us new information.
Some possibilities become more interesting. Others become less so.
And gradually, what initially felt like uncertainty begins to look more like direction.
Direction doesn’t require certainty.
It simply gives us somewhere to begin.
Confidence often comes later
People sometimes tell themselves:
Once I feel more confident, I’ll make a change.
But confidence doesn’t always arrive before action.
Often, it grows because we have taken a few thoughtful steps, learnt something about ourselves and discovered that we can navigate the uncertainty.
One misconception about career decisions is that confidence comes first.
In my experience, it rarely does.
Confidence often grows after we’ve tested an idea, had a useful conversation, remembered something we’re good at, or recognised a strength that had become so familiar we’d stopped seeing its value.
That’s why career conversations are rarely about finding the “right” answer in a single sitting.
They’re about recognising patterns.
Connecting experiences.
Noticing strengths that have become familiar.
And little by little, allowing the picture to become clearer.
A question for you
If you’re feeling stuck today, perhaps don’t begin with:
“What should I do with the rest of my life?”
That’s an enormous question to expect yourself to answer.
Try something smaller:
What do I already know about myself that might be worth exploring?
What kind of work gives me energy rather than drains it?
What is one small step I could take this week?
You don’t need to know exactly where the path ends before you begin walking it.
Sometimes the first sign of progress is simply discovering a better question.
A final reflection
Think back over your working life. Not just your job titles, but the moments within them.
What question, if you asked it differently today, might help you see your career differently tomorrow?